My Son's Personality Changed For The Worse After He Became Drug Free

by Kate
(Victoria)

Why didn't I get the same son back after he successfully got off drugs? He's very different personality then he was BEFORE his addiction.

I feel like my son died 6 yrs ago before he hit rehab ... and even though he has not done drugs in 4 years and is married now ... the son I knew never survived.

It feels like a death to me ... such a severe loss. His personality is so different and the way he treats me is so cruelly. He married a woman who abuses him physically and emotionally. He barely contacts me. He would have never acted like this before his addiction. I am at a loss.

Has anyone else had a noticeable change in personality in their loved one, even though they were successfully rehabilitated?

Alcoholism-and-Drug-Addiction-Help.com Answer

Firstly, it's important that you be grateful your son has dealt with and overcome his drug addiction. It's a massive achievement and something you should be proud of.

The fact that he's also gotten married and had a child means he's come a long way, even if his marriage isn't what you'd like it to be. Hopefully he's mature and strong enough to deal with whatever issues there are in his relationship.

As to why his personality and behavior, especially towards you, has changed since going through rehab ... only he'll be able to answer that. Have you spoken to him and asked him why?

People change, attitudes and personalities change, and the fact that it seemingly happened after leaving rehab could be coincidental. Maybe rehab did change him, but why his attitude towards you changed since that point, only he can answer.

So try and communicate with your son and rebuild your relationship with him. It's not uncommon for their to be unresolved issues between child and parent that play a part in their addiction.

Being in rehab where your son would have received intensive therapy, may have brought some of those issues to the fore. But of course that's pure speculation.

The only person who can answer your question is your son. So you need to try and have a conversation with him to find out why. As his mother it can't be easy having your son treat you so badly, but no relationship is irreparable, so don't give up on resolving things with him.

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